A conversational overview of WTF the deal is with Koreas right now...

I was chatting with my sister, who doesn't keep up with current events like I do - and partly as a joke and partly for something for her to read as she tried killing the work day she asked for a history of what the news is on Korea. I wanted to see how much I could accomplish in a five-minute blurb. Here is the comprehensive low-brow description of what is going down and the history behind it.

So, Prior to the US involvement in WWII, The Japanese face-fucked most of East Asia into submission and made them part of their illustrious Empire. During this period, a lot of the former ruling classes of Korea were in exile in the Soviet Union. This is the time/place where Kim Jong Il was born. After WWII, when Japan got curb stomped by the allied nations, and they busied themselves rebuilding Germany and Japan and the Cold War was heating up - those exiles returned to Korea.

Initially it was founded as a Republic, but after a series of failed elections that all saw heavy allegations of fraud and corruption - a growing socialist party tried to grab power. The power grab quickly devolved into a civil war, and both sides brought their backers in. North Korea pulled in the Soviet Union and the recently formed People's Republic of China while South Korea drew aid from NATO and the US. Enter the Korean War and every episode of MASH that you may/may not remember. The Korean War was most noteworthy on a global scale as the first significant armed conflict in the Cold War.

It was also known as the funniest of all 21st century wars due to the wide-spread deployment of wise-cracking doctors...
The war never officially ended, but an armistice was reached on July 1953, with a DMZ established at the current battle-line of the 38th parallel. After lengthy negotiations the world lost interest and Korea rested in the relative obscurity of the World's eye.

Fast forward to the fall of the Soviet Union; With the Soviets down North Korea lost one of its major backers, and its economy turned to shit. Progressively Kim Jong Il, who had recently inherited power from his father, started getting even more crazy and ruthless (an accomplishment for any dictator). With the continued boldness of North Korea and their desire to be viewed as a world power, they started to lost support from their last major supporter, China, who is also turned off by their constant and shady attempts to develop nuclear weapons.

He is the reason I have a standing policy never to trust shirtless Asian people (except Bruce Lee)

Developing nukes and their constant funding of extremist organizations has seen them under constant scrutiny by the UN and getting slapped on the wrist with numerous economic sanctions and angry letters.

In recent news - on 26 Mar a South Korean corvette (The Cheonan) sunk along the NLL (Northern Limit Line), the northernmost naval boundary between the Koreas and a site of numerous clashes since it was established after the armistice. At first North Korea stayed quiet and all officials were really reluctant to name any cause. A week after the Cheonan sank, it was found that the ship was conclusively sunk by an external explosion, and North Korea started making denials. When the international team of investigators found remains of a North-Korean produced torpedo amongst the wreckage, South Korea was pissed and demanded an apology from the North. North Korea told South Korea to go fuck itself, and in response North Korea cut off economic ties (this was Mondayish)

South Korea is responsible for a HUGE portion of North Korea's income, so this doesn't make the North happy. In response after a day or two they cut off all diplomatic relations with South Korea and expel all South Korean citizens (an action normally reserved for when a country is RIGHT about to go to war).

Now we are in a stand off where China is trying to calm the two down, not wanting to see a fire-fight on their front door. Russia doesn't seem to care and hasn't said much of shit. Japan and the US are like 'Fuck you, North Korea chill out and say you are sorry". With our mutual defense treaty saying that if the two Koreas throw down, we have to jump in to back the South up.

So that's where we are now. While the Obama administration is adamant about trying to defuse the situation, they still make it known that they condemn the attack. They also sent Secretary of State Hillary Clinton to talk to all the regional heads-of-state for a 'diplomatic' solution. Personally I think this is just to piss off all the countries involved because if I had a lot of shit going on and I had to go and talk to Hillary I would be pretty offended and pissed off. Maybe Obama is also hoping she gets assassinated and the US gets a two-fer out of the deal. Hillary Clinton gets off AND Kim Jong Il gets the piss bombed out of his crazy ass.

Sending this lady to talk to you is like the international way of putting a flaming bag of dog poop at your front door (in my personal opinion)

Dark Heresy - A brief review (Part 1 of However many I end up writing)

I have got a chance to start running a game of Dark Heresy for some friends a few weeks ago. For those unfamiliar with the game; it is a paper-and-pencil role playing game taking place in the dark and gritty universe of Warhammer 40k. The players take on the roles of acolytes for the fabled and mysterious Inquisition, a secret organization that exists largely as myth and is tasked with fighting the manifold enemies of humanity regardless of cost, holding authority over all but the Immortal God-Emperor himself and his Adeptus Custodes.

The system is a lot of fun, the full depths of which I am still in the process of retrieving from the foggy depths of my memory. It is a system very unlike most other games I have played, and seems to really shine in three particular kinds of story elements “intrigue”, “action”, and “horror”.

Intrigue – The best place for the Inquisition to work is in the shadows, while they have limitless authority and could flash their badges of office (if the party would even be issued with such things) and get anything they want – many Inquisitors realize this closes as many doors as it opens. One of the huge threats to humanity takes form of evil cults or secret societies. To combat threats Acolytes must be subtle, tracking down contacts and unearthing clues to whatever insidious machinations such organizations have in store.

In game terms this takes the form of a wide array of skills for social interactions (Charm, Scrutiny, Intimidation, Deceive, and Inquiry, even Interrogation) to help them unearth clues and get people to tell them what they know without immediately playing good-cop-bad-cop and making things official. There are also a huge amount of skills based on specific kinds of information that might unearth subtle clues that help the PCs piece together their mystery (Common Lore (Imperium, War, Ecclesiarchy, Tech, Administratum, etc.), Scholastic Lore (Chymestry, Astromancy, and Law), Forbidden Lore (Xenos, the Warp, Cults, Mutants, Daemons, etc.)). There is a quote that floats around the 40k universe that goes “Knowledge is power, guard it well” – something that truly becomes evident in one of the only RPGs I’ve played where knowledge skills can prove to be as or more important then combat skills.

Action – I won’t hit on this too much. Most RPGs out there have their own action elements and mechanics and saying the system lets you kick ass and take names is nothing unique to any game in a genre where empowerment fantasies are abound. However, combat in Dark Heresy is BRUTAL. Very often you find yourself legitimately concerned for your characters lives, and while some systems may have you blast away with guns at point-blank range to little effect – people start dropping quick when the bullets/las bolts/bolt-rounds/super-heated plasma starts flying. If Dungeons and Dragon’s combat system is Rock & Roll, then Star Wars is Alt Rock, GURPs and Rifts are Punk, then Dark Heresy is Heavy Metal…just to take the analogy its full course and before any Vampire/Werewolf gamers chime in – White Wolf games are Emo Rock.

Horror – In a world where just beyond the thin veil of the Imperium of Man and the ethereal void that is Chaos (or Warp-space) where Daemons circle like vultures to prey on anyone they find to show that right moment of weakness, horror plays a big part in the story telling. The Acolytes through their career will be exposed to all manner of horror. It is experienced in the shock and trauma that comes from being in pitched battles. It is felt when they look upon an abominable brain-eating alien possessing physiology is so different that the primal parts of the brain scream and try to claw its way out of your skull. It comes in the form of the very raw materials of daemons that push their way through into the living world from their realms of pure madness and evil. Such is the sacrifice of someone who serves the Inquisition, they expose themselves and deal with the aberrations that prey on humanity so the rest of the world can sleep easy at night.

In the game this really shines through a quick-paced system for dealing with Fear, and the reactions players may have to the shit they see (To quote – “I’ve seen some shit…and some stuff…and none of it good.”). It also is represented through two more long-term gauges of how disturbed your player may be or how much palpable evil they have been in the presence of.

With Insanity points, your player slowly gets driven mad as their career progresses and they are exposed to increasingly unsettling events. As your character progresses they begin to delve odd tics and habits which represent this. Eventually, if not curbed through counseling, soul-cleansing rituals, or retreats to monasteries, your character will go off the deep end and become unplayable. There is also a more nasty system for Corruption points.

Corruption points are like a Geiger counter for how much of the raw stuff of the universe you have been exposed to. Daemons, Psykers, and where they all draw their power come from the Warp: a constantly-shifting realm of madness – and exposure to it tends to spark mutation. As your corruption points increase you are slowly twisted into a hideous mutant horror, starting with minor disfigurements at first and working up to being as unsightly as some of the monsters you fight! This can also be curbed and corrected, but there is only so much that can be done.

These systems aren’t all bad though. Mutations normally have minor perks, though un-cosmetic you could gain better hand dexterity through the addition of an extra set of thumbs or sharper eye sight with cat-like eyes. And with Insanity, the more points you accumulate the more unfased you are by the terrible sights you take in. For what are the horrors of the physical world compared to those that dwell in the human heart or mind?